reflection….

I was on my usual morning walk this week and asked for a word to share with you…As I turned into my driveway, I saw a mourning dove cooing next to my porch. I had heard him before I approached and was instantly transported. My father had retired and was living in sunny Yuma AZ where among other things he enjoyed the wildlife esp. the birds he fed. I had visited him many times in 2014 because his health was in a continual state of failure. My walks there were sunny, warm and full of the sights and sounds of doves and his favorite, the quail.

In July of 2015 he was in rehab after another very painful back surgery. I was there to take him home and purposed to move him closer to Ohio and family. That week was painfully hot, it was 120 degrees most days….I came back from my walk and there was a dove on his patio, feet up, deader that dead. I laughed because it struck me as funny and at the same time had a foreboding feeling that was not good. I braced myself for the day and headed out to bring him home. The very next day was the day that Sarah flew away. August 1st, 2015. Nothing in the whole world could have prepared me for that moment. The foreboding I felt was for her, not him….

What this bird reminded me of today was that grief and mourning never end. This IS part of life. When my dad passed we knew it was coming and we all prepared for it, he was ready to go. We were all gathered around him and waited with baited breathe. However, sometimes it’s a suddenly, a surprise, a shock and always a tragedy no matter of the “how.”

One of the biggest things I’ve learned is that we have to feel it to heal it. If too many losses accumulate and we don’t heal from them, all manner of problems and symptoms arise. Take care of your heart. Take care of your mind. Take care of the ones near and dear to you. If you can’t manage the pain then seek help…what we don’t heal from our children inherit. I love you. ~dd